Wellness Corner: The Big Ego by Joanne Kosta, RN
A NEW EARTH by Eckhart Tolle is a book that came crashing into my life recently. In some ways it feels like freezing cold water splashed on my face. Let me share some of the things I am learning.
· My EGO wants to run everything: It creates (and sticks to) a story about how life “should” be. It thrives on the hurt that occurs and creates stories around each of these. It takes offense at others frequently. It wants to rule my life and tells me that I should never “settle” for less than I deserve.
· Old pain feeds the EGO: We have all had experiences where we felt uncomfortable feelings (ie hurt, afraid, or angry). Usually, we can remember these in an instant. In fact, when something or someone reminds us of these experiences—we rise up and have a reaction! That reaction then works like gasoline on the fire of the EGO.
· Self respect and self care is not the same as EGO: It is acceptable and humble to acknowledge myself as important and my needs as legitimate. I don’t have to get mad or act like a pseudo-martyr to get my needs met. That would be a “story” that is EGO driven and not healthy. “Look at me…Look at what has been taken from me! Can you believe what I put up with!? Can you see how little I live with?” Instead of EGO, pay attention to the healthy ME. Take care of yourself like you really matter…which you do!
· Noticing is everything: The ego cannot co-exist in the light of awareness. The best thing for me to do is to pay attention. Be aware that I don’t know everything. That I am learning all of the time. That I am collecting very important pieces of information that I will use to make every decision about my perceptions and my actions in each day. I can pay 100% attention, make a response, but not create a “story” about it. Especially a story about how I am “right” and others are “wrong.”
· Respond—don’t react: Let go of the drama. Respond with awareness and calmness of spirit. Try to avoid saying, “I couldn’t help it. That’s just how I am.” Try to avoid blaming someone else for your decisions, your situations, your life’s path. Remember that the EGO cannot stand the light of awareness and consciousness. When I am more aware, the EGO backs down and there is no space for its shenanigans. I can make choices, set boundaries—but I don’t have to be EGO driven.
It is some pretty heady stuff. But, it seemed worthy of my attention and maybe yours too. If you don’t have patience for any of this—that’s Ok. Just eat well, get plenty of sleep and exercise, have good friends, and don’t blame anyone or anything for your hardships. Have a great summer. Inviting your EGO to step aside might help with those hot, humid days. Your family will probably thank you.
Ms. Kosta is a registered nurse who received her BSN from the College of Mt. St. Joseph in 1981. She has specialized in the field of prevention, healthy lifestyles, and natural approaches toward wellness. She is in her 15th year as an Independent Shaklee Distributor. You can reach Ms. Kosta @ 419-332-3857 or email her at healthnow@glis.cc
